Tales From My Bedroom Floor: Volume 5, The Victim

3b6460b136ab16bbc9a3b5bda4ea6ba1

Volume 5 is now up on My Trending Stories! Go read here:  https://mytrendingstories.com/article/tales-from-my-bedroom-floor-volume-5-the-victim/

 

In this six part series, I go through times that were pivotal in collecting my personal and detrimental belief system, all while crying on my bedroom floor.

And if you like my writing so far, please share and comment. I’m working on a new and long term project and would really like some feedback on my writing style. Thanks ya’ll and stay witchy ( *)

Energy is Input/ Output: Manifesting Your Fears

 

In the past, when I started to date someone new, I wouldn’t tell anyone about it in the beginning. I was terrified that it would end and I would look dumb for being excited. I originally put out into the universe that the relationship would fail.

Here I was bringing all of the anxiety of the Moon with me. The energy of my fears was more powerful than my excitement, so what manifested into reality? The fear, of course.

I was so married to the outcome that I just couldn’t enjoy the ride. As the Magician, who upright suggests careful planning and action, reversed displays a lack of direction. Because I was too focused on my fears and the “inevitable” fail (because at this point I didn’t think I deserved love) my anxieties would take the wheel and steer me off course. My lack of clarity and inability to pinpoint what I wanted and how to get it allowed my fears to push me over to the side and take center stage.

So if you are stuck in this place where you are constantly failing in relationships, try to look at your involvement in them. Are you putting out a palpable energy out into the universe, or constantly picking partners with an expiration date? If so, it’s time to switch gears and turn that Magician right side up. Stay witchy ( *)

Where Are You In Your Journey: Episode 3

final

witchywisdoms.com

Episode 3 is live! Here you’ll meet Kia Graves, a New York based producer, actor, and writer, who shares about her rape trauma and journey through healing as a single mother. If you’d like to follow up with Kia you can find her on Instagram, Facebook, and through Mountain Moving Studio.

Kia Graves Headshot

Tales From My Bedroom Floor: Volume 4, The Best Friend

3b6460b136ab16bbc9a3b5bda4ea6ba1

 

Volume 4 is now up on My Trending Stories! Go read here:  https://mytrendingstories.com/article/tales-from-my-bedroom-floor-volume-4-the-best-friend/

In this six part series, I go through times that were pivotal in collecting my personal and detrimental belief system, all while crying on my bedroom floor.

And if you like my writing so far, please share and comment. I’m working on a new and long term project and would really like some feedback on my writing style. Thanks ya’ll and stay witchy ( *)

When to Stay and When to Walk Away

When you turn around and see the Devil leering over your shoulder, it is time to get the fuck out. The chains of lust are not enough to keep you safe, and your safety is your main concern. To ignore him hiding in the bushes is denial, and he will inevitably bring you down. 

The Devil shows obsession. Codependency. Impulsiveness. All of the quick-fix-sick-personality traits that are meant to fill a void in our heart but never will. And when we couple the Devil with the Lovers, we tend to care for our partner in a seemingly selfless way, but actually one which is purely selfish. They are the air we breathe, and we need to give them anything we have to keep them enabling our sickness. 

When the relationship is toxic, and it generally is when it’s foundation is codependent, when do we know for ourselves when to stay and when to walk away? 

I think realistically, one never knows concretely, black and white, when to walk away. It is not going to be written on a sign, in a textbook, or in a blog. Rather, it is a feeling in the gut, through your blood and rattling your bones. It is more than a decision on paper; it is a matter of life or death. To ignore our bodies responses to something toxic is spiritually irresponsible. 

When I was in my toxic relationship, riddled with (rightful and deserved) paranoia and sick feelings, I ignored it. I shoved it down way deep inside because it was far more important to hear the words “I love you,” than to take responsibility for where I was in that time. I would have rather been an empty shell than alone. That was the state of the matter. 

In fact, I knew I had to walk away. That wasn’t the issue. The issue was not only that I felt trapped in the matter, but I also didn’t want to leave. I was comfortable in tragedy. I felt at home in despair. Crying was my normal. 

It’s easier said than done to extract yourself and have an out-of-body experience that pulls you out of the unnecessary nonsense. To realize that melancholy isn’t the end all be all. But the sadness is your body’s way of telling you that something isn’t right. I invite you to look at the ratio of bliss to sorrow. Make a list of pros and cons. And don’t cheat yourself; make an honest list. Your spirit will thank you. Stay witchy ( *) 

Where Are You In Your Journey: Episode 2

final

witchywisdoms.com

Episode 2 is live! Here you’ll meet Vanessa Meyer, a Los Angeles based hair stylist and dear friend of mine, who imparts some wisdom on finding your purpose. If you want to follow up with her, find her on Instagram @theglitterwhore and www.theglitterwhore.com

 

Listen below, on iTunes, and on Soundcloud ( *)


Tales From My Bedroom Floor: Volume 3, The Drunk

3b6460b136ab16bbc9a3b5bda4ea6ba1

Volume 3 is now up on My Trending Stories! Go read here:  https://mytrendingstories.com/article/tales-from-my-bedroom-floor-volume-3-the-drunk/

In this six part series, I go through times that were pivotal in collecting my personal and detrimental belief system, all while crying on my bedroom floor.

And if you like my writing so far, please share and comment. I’m working on a new and long term project and would really like some feedback on my writing style. Thanks ya’ll and stay witchy ( *)

Happiness Allowance 

 It’s difficult to trust things when they are good, isn’t it? 

I find myself asking when the other shoe will drop quite often, and in order to protect myself from disappointment, I’ll allot myself a happiness allowance. 

If I’m only so happy, I can only be so disappointed. 

But why would you limit your ability to be happy? Sure, there is always the possibility of a low to counter the high, but don’t you think you’re deserving of happiness, fleeting or not?

In the Nine of Cups, we see wishes fulfilled. We see a celebration of comfort and happiness. We see true bliss. This is something we need to relish an appreciate, not something we block out because of fear. 

When we do that, we become the Ace of Cupes reversed, which denotes repressed emotions. Any emotion that isn’t felt fully, good OR bad, is like a loaded gun. And to diminish the amount of joy we feel is just plain unfair. 

Treating happiness with skepticism is cheating yourself. Only allowing a bit of it so you don’t over sell your true emotions is a cop out. I know that disappointment is scary, but to live fully and authentically we must live in the moment and cherish our feelings as is right now. Anxiety surrounding the future and paranoia regarding the past should not keep you from experiencing the natural highs of the present. Feel authentically and stay witchy ( *)