When You’re Stuck in a Negative Energy Vacuum

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I have been in a situation that I will allude to cryptically, but it is not one I can easily walk away from. There are a lot of personalities that I’ve come across lately that include entitlement and plain disrespect, and it’s kind of turned my entire world upside down.

When faced with a barrage of negativity as a generally positive and peaceful person, I get affected. And lately I have started to question my core beliefs because of this. Is the universe echoing to me what I’m putting out? Is manifestation even real? How is it possible that I can let this get to me so completely?

Which is why this situation is affecting my world around me. I’m absorbing and regurgitating these bad juju’s and I’m having encounters with people that I’ve never had before. Negative, awful, run ins. When I thought I had reached the light at the end of the tunnel, I was dropped into quicksand. Everything is cycling around me and it’s hard to see past the spiral.

Before I go on, let me be clear, as an empath, I understand what being sensitive actually is. It is not being dramatic, it is not flipping out or being easily offended. It is exactly what it is defined as:

adjective quick to detect or respond to slight changes, signals, or influences; (of a person or a person’s behavior) having or displaying a quick and delicate appreciation of others’ feelings.

Which is why, when I am disrespected, talked down to, and belittled, I get affected. No, it is not because I believe I am unworthy. I’ve been through that before and no one can tell me I am not good enough anymore. But it’s because I sense the place that the other person is coming from, and it is a point of pain and insecurity. It is a small and infantile energy that pokes and prods and I want nothing to do with it, yet I’m somehow confined to continue dealing with a toddler that keeps flipping the back of my neck.

So…

Which do you choose? The blue pill, or the red pill?

As a seeker of knowledge and truth, the red pill is not only attractive, it’s necessary for survival. I choose not to see a situation as an isolated interaction, but rather what it says about the entire environment. And because I choose to not live in ignorance, I have the power to step out of the matrix and redirect in a positive path.

I see the person who belittles as the small child that they are. Yes, it is annoying, but there is always a way out. It’s not my responsibility to parent the child, but it’s my responsibility to take care of myself. I ultimately can leave the playground if I choose to.

This involves Strength to see past the chaos of the Tower. Inevitably, the dissolution of this entire situation will bring more positivity than negativity, but it is up to me to dig myself out of the rubble. When something is not working, you either fix it, or accept that it is beyond repair.

So, witches, I have bad days too. I’ve had many in a row, actually. But I can get past them, and so can you, Stay strong, and stay witchy ( *)

 

When the Oppressed Become the Oppressor



Brought to you by another RuPaul gem, this week is all about werk, werk, werk.

In some of his earlier podcast episodes, Ru talks about queens that get a slice of fame after chasing it for so long, and then start to emulate the monster celebrities that preceded them. They become hard to work with and act like damn DIVAS.

Does this sound familiar in any realm of your life? Because, for me, this sounds like what I’ve come to experience when working for other people. And, in all honesty, when I became the person to work for.

When people get promoted from within and have no real managerial experience, the jump is made naturally by mimicking the manager before them. This is the same as a parent/ child dynamic. It’s literally monkey see monkey do. So, if they were berated, mistreated, abused, and overworked, what do you think the natural managing style they will try to adopt is?

Now, unless you are more matured or have an innately high EI, this is the pattern you will follow. But on the flipside, that could hurt you, as it did for me when I became a manager.

Fighting so hard against what I had been exposed to didn’t leave me in a firm middle ground. Instead, it sent me over the line to pansy-ville where I would cater to everyones needs and pick up all of the slack. This was a dire case of people pleasing.

This left me with shoe prints on my back waiting for someone to throw me a bone and help me out. And it was also the precursor for the behavior that sent me down a road of codependence. I had no boundaries to speak of. I couldn’t protect myself from being taken advantage of, all while I thought I was doing the best thing for everyone (which is just impossible.)

Managing a business or department is hard work, but it doesn’t have to be a burden. As the reversed position of the Ten of Wands suggests, you don’t have to unnecessarily hold on to the attachment of dictatorship. There is a way to lead in a structured, yet respectful manner. And you may not learn that until the inevitable chaos of the Tower erupts and you are forced to change.

So, if you’re having trouble with your boss, and you like all of the other aspects about your job except for her or him, just remember that their behavior is a product of conditioning. If they are too hard on you, it’s most likely because they don’t have any other way to assert their dominance. Don’t take it too personally. And if you hate your job entirely, LEAVE. I know it’s a scary world out there, but it’s scarier to sit in a place of complacent misery for the rest of your life. I’ve known countless people to change full on careers between the ages of forty and sixty, so there are no excuses. Any age, any time, you can change your life to make you happier. Use awareness, get happy, and stay witchy ( *)

Where Are You In Your Journey: Episode 10

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witchywisdoms.com

Episode 10 is live! Here you’ll meet Lydia Georgantzi, a sweet young actress from Greece who practices self defense. If you’d like to follow up with Lydia you can find her on Facebook or Instagram!

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Tune in below and on iTunes ( *)

Standing By Your Shit

 

The Moon symbolizes fears and illusions within the subconscious. A lot of the times these fears will come up in interpersonal relationships, because if you critique yourself too harshly, more often than not you will project these illusions on other people. Judgement and shame will do that to a person.

Living with shame is not the way anyone wants to go about their life, and yet, it is all too common. Shame is consuming, and it’s a by-product of people pleasing. When we go around trying to depict a perfect version of ourselves to others, rather than living in authenticity, we usually do it in the avoidance of shame. We all have pasts, some more sorted than others, and we need to stand by our shit in order to maintain our truth.

Standing by your shit is important because it comes from valuing yourself and your accomplishments. It means that you are secure in who you are and what you do, because you have the ability to forgive yourself and also to congratulate yourself.

Strength plays a key role here. And inner strength works across the board: in forgiving yourself for your past, accepting yourself in your present, and trusting yourself in your future. These tasks are not easy, but they are vital for growth. And, darlin, it takes strength to grow.

Looking in the mirror and automatically loving ourselves doesn’t come so easy to most of us. But standing by your shit, recognizing that it isn’t all pretty, and giving yourself permission to have a past as a human is humbling and strong. So stand up, be strong, and stay witchy ( *)

Giving Acknowledgement and Love to Your Inner Critic

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We’ve visited this card before. Strength. The woman, strong and compassionate, tames the lion in her lap with her peaceful energy.

This is how I want you to look at your relationship with your inner critic. You are the goddess atop the beast. The lion is your inner critic; the manifestation of your fears. You can tame this wild animal but only with compassion and acknowledgement. By shutting out your inner critic, whipping the lion and beating it down, you only anger it to come back with more intensity. If you recognize that your inner critic is actually your fears trying to protect you, just in a very negative way, you can address it with kindness, and choose to listen to the stronger voice within you.

Your inner critic is a part of you. It is your own voice. And in self love, we need to love EVERY part of ourselves to give way to growth. By telling our inner critic to just go fuck off, we aren’t addressing why we’re having those thoughts in the first place, and we can’t, therefore, get curious enough to replace them with kind ones. In self discovery, we need to acknowledge all of our little bits and pieces to see why our machine runs the way it does. Only then can we give ourselves some upgrades.

So get curious and compassionate. Let your inner critic exist while choosing not to give in to the negativity. And as always, stay witchy ( *)

Why Compassion is so Powerful

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True strength comes from compassion.

Is anyone else fiery? Hot-tempered? Impulsive??

Well, I know that is definitely part of my character. Much like the lion in this card, I have tamed these traits over time, but when I was younger I would shoot off like a pistol whenever someone did something I didn’t like.

Compassion is an art form. Learning to understand and accept people is extremely difficult, especially when you don’t like most people and are quick to judge. However, learning to act with compassion towards those you don’t understand creates inner peace.

Rather than wasting a bunch of hateful energy, compassion has the ability to release.

For example, I work in a bar. Sometimes, because I am overworked and tired 99% of the time, people rub me the wrong way. A hasty gesture, or just mild rudeness can turn me into a sword-wielding Beatrix Kiddo. But if I take a minute to remind myself to act with compassion, it releases all of this unnecessary tension I have stored against this complete stranger.

When you hold onto that weird, made up grudge, you are the only one that feels it. No one else is affected by it but you. Sometimes people may sense that you are in a bad mood, and they might feel uncomfortable, but you are ultimately the one swimming in misery. You’re just creating a hateful world for yourself to live in.

Being compassionate is even more rewarding if it’s a friend. If someone close to you said something you didn’t like, you have to freedom to open a dialogue. Not in an argumentative, mortal-kombat-finish-him type way but from a place of wanting to understand. You would be amazed at how the stories you made up about that comment or gesture are actually pretty far from the truth. And gaining insight helps you to be a little more human each day.

So lets get collectively compassionate. It would be a better world if we were. Stay witchy my friends ( *)