Boundaries in Business

IMG_5186It’s one thing to invest in yourself, change your life for the better, and heal with intention. I was on that journey a few years ago and am so happy I made the decision to do so.

However, it’s an entirely different story to make this path into your business.

I’ve worked with quite a few women who signed up with me in a heartbeat and started transforming their lives in the exact same way that I did. But, what I’ve been seeing a lot of lately is the hemming and hawing of people who aren’t ready to make the leap. The questions of price and discounts and freebies. Interested parties that know they need the help but just don’t want to invest.

And, as an empath, I used to cater to these people early in my business. In fact, I have up until very recently. I used to (and still do, to some degree) understand the inability to pay for coaching or even an ebook. I remembered the excuses I used to make to get in the way of my own development, so I would I try to help people that are in the same static place that I was three years ago. But I’ve learned now that there needs to be a boundary in place to protect my light and give it to those that see the value in my work.

You see, the difference between my clients now (and me three years ago) and the girls looking for handouts, is that we knew what we needed to do to get out of our deep, dark rut, and we went for it. It wasn’t a question of price or package. It was a question of life or death.

And much like Death, we knew we had to invest a piece of ourselves for transformational change. It didn’t matter, because the value was priceless. Recently I’ve just had my own death and rebirth, in which I realized more firm boundaries need to be kept in place.

The Emperor comes to mind as I enact a more masculine flow of energy to the business side of my coaching practice. Yes, the nurturing, feminine ability I have as an empath is a beautiful gift, but when not balanced with masculine boundaries, you fall prey to those who want to take advantage of you.

So if this sounds familiar, and you, like me, are lacking clients because of your own empathy, it’s time to wake up and stand up for yourself and your business. And if you are a person who needs help but only wants it for free, realize that you’re only going to receive back what you put in, and there isn’t much reward from nothing. Invest in yourself, and stay witchy ( *)

 

Season 2: Episode 12

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witchywisdoms.com

Season 2, Episode 12 is live! And this is the last episode of the season!!!!!!!

I’m coming to you solo today to discuss creatively switching up your thought process and how it can lead to successful manifestation. I thought it would be a great way to tie up the season, and I even have a surprise announcement at the end of the episode!

Listen up and stay witchy ( *)

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Tune in below and on iTunes, and be sure to subscribe and leave a rating!!! ( *)

Theme song by Gramatik

Rerouting Conversations

img_4630The theme in my life the past two months has been of negativity, paranoia, and betrayal. What fun is that?!

In fact, it’s come to my attention that a lot of my interactions with friends has been circling around complaints and assumptions. That, my dear sweets, is a recipe for disaster.

Here’s how it all starts: you get thrust into a new environment, it takes some time to adjust, and you’re absorbing absorbing absorbing. Unfortunately, the energy circling around is negative, and you become a dark sponge after a while. All of the verbiage that is bestowed on you becomes apart of your vernacular. You start becoming part of the problem.

And quite honestly, I’m not one to deal with negativity well. I don’t think many people are, but as an empath I find it excruciating. I act out because it feels like a physical weight.

But to take a step back and see things through the looking glass, as they actually are, you can put things in their proper box and step over it. You can triumph in the wake of something that isn’t serving you emotionally, but may be in other ways (i.e. financially.)

What the plan is, going forward, is to re-route and re-direct. Although I hate to admit that it’s taken me this long to figure out the solution, I arrived at the destination and that’s all that matters. This is why I suggest everyone get a life coach: then you don’t have to figure it all out yourself 😉

As the reversed position of the Seven of Swords suggests, it’s time to break through the mental challenges. At the end of the day, we are the only ones standing in our way, and it’s as simple as flipping a switch. No, it doesn’t seem simple in the beginning, but if you keep at it, and combat one negative thought with three positive ones, you’re already beating the system.

Use the Chariot as a guide to control your thoughts. If you see that you are taking part in a conversation that is complain-y or negative, either consciously reroute the conversation, or simply leave. The fact that you INTENTIONALLY are steering clear of negativity is the biggest and most important part.

No this isn’t that easy. Yes it will take practice. But putting intentional positivity into the universe will yield insane results in your life. No one enjoys a spiral. No one wants to be a Negative Nancy. So notice, stop, redirect, and stay witchy ( *)

 

 

 

 

 

 

When You’re Stuck in a Negative Energy Vacuum

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I have been in a situation that I will allude to cryptically, but it is not one I can easily walk away from. There are a lot of personalities that I’ve come across lately that include entitlement and plain disrespect, and it’s kind of turned my entire world upside down.

When faced with a barrage of negativity as a generally positive and peaceful person, I get affected. And lately I have started to question my core beliefs because of this. Is the universe echoing to me what I’m putting out? Is manifestation even real? How is it possible that I can let this get to me so completely?

Which is why this situation is affecting my world around me. I’m absorbing and regurgitating these bad juju’s and I’m having encounters with people that I’ve never had before. Negative, awful, run ins. When I thought I had reached the light at the end of the tunnel, I was dropped into quicksand. Everything is cycling around me and it’s hard to see past the spiral.

Before I go on, let me be clear, as an empath, I understand what being sensitive actually is. It is not being dramatic, it is not flipping out or being easily offended. It is exactly what it is defined as:

adjective quick to detect or respond to slight changes, signals, or influences; (of a person or a person’s behavior) having or displaying a quick and delicate appreciation of others’ feelings.

Which is why, when I am disrespected, talked down to, and belittled, I get affected. No, it is not because I believe I am unworthy. I’ve been through that before and no one can tell me I am not good enough anymore. But it’s because I sense the place that the other person is coming from, and it is a point of pain and insecurity. It is a small and infantile energy that pokes and prods and I want nothing to do with it, yet I’m somehow confined to continue dealing with a toddler that keeps flipping the back of my neck.

So…

Which do you choose? The blue pill, or the red pill?

As a seeker of knowledge and truth, the red pill is not only attractive, it’s necessary for survival. I choose not to see a situation as an isolated interaction, but rather what it says about the entire environment. And because I choose to not live in ignorance, I have the power to step out of the matrix and redirect in a positive path.

I see the person who belittles as the small child that they are. Yes, it is annoying, but there is always a way out. It’s not my responsibility to parent the child, but it’s my responsibility to take care of myself. I ultimately can leave the playground if I choose to.

This involves Strength to see past the chaos of the Tower. Inevitably, the dissolution of this entire situation will bring more positivity than negativity, but it is up to me to dig myself out of the rubble. When something is not working, you either fix it, or accept that it is beyond repair.

So, witches, I have bad days too. I’ve had many in a row, actually. But I can get past them, and so can you, Stay strong, and stay witchy ( *)

 

WednesdayWisdoms: Releasing the Negative

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When shitty things happen to you, and they will through the course of your life, you have two clear routes to take. As discussed in the previous post, you can turn to whiney victimhood, or to raw vulnerability that helps you move on in an organic way.

But before you get to this fork in the road, there is a long stretch of grieving. Some of us know how to grieve, in fact, we’re seasoned professionals. Some of us others, however, would rather push the grief down or aside until it takes the wheel as an act of rebellion,  and we’re forced down the road of panicky, inconsistent victimhood.

So for all of the events, people, pets, homes, jobs, or traumas you never got to grieve, I have an exercise in purging some of the anger that leads us down the back alley of victimhood.

We’re going to write down everything we wish we could have said “no” to.

I suggest Post-it notes or index cards. You want to write each specific event on a card of it’s own. We aren’t making a list, we’re giving individual space to each shitty life event.

There is no need to journal on this either. Give your event a title, and as you write it down, imagine what it would look like if you could have said “no” to this particular event.

Then, for each card, I want you to burn it (safely!) over an open flame. As you do, say the following:

“I cannot change the past, but I can re-route my future. I accept the reality of the present, and release my anger towards ___________”

This should help to begin a revolutionary healing process. Acceptance is the final stage of grief in the Kübler- Ross Grief Cycle. But we must move through the other six stages in order to get there.

What I find people hang on to the most in grief is guilt and anger. This ritual should alleviate some of those feelings so you can continue your journey inward, and then onward. Stay strong, and, as always, stay witchy ( *)

Showing Up with the Right Attitude

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Have you ever had a day where you dreaded going to work? Or had an event you really didn’t want to go to? Well, so has everyone else. However, if you show up with a good attitude, you might find some silver linings.

The power of a positive attitude is unsurpassed. Taking a minute for some deep breathing, concentrating on being positive, and letting the negativity go has a lot of rewards. For one, it alleviates stress. Two, it it helps you gain an opposite perspective. Going into something undesirable with a negative attitude only makes the situation twice as unbearable. If you have an (at least) neutral attitude about said event, you will have a better time because you’ve opened yourself up to it.

Much like a magician, you have the power to change your attitude. It takes a little bit of work at first, but after that, its just a little reminder. I, for one, like meditation and mantras. Those serve as my time for reminders. And they always will. Because being automatically positive 100% of the time is not only unattainable, but its fake. So to strive for that is really far-fetched.

Working on having a positive attitude one day at a time reaps a lot of benefits. People want to be around positive people, don’t you? So stay positive, and stay witchy ( *)