Worrywart

5 of pentacles web copy

Two days in a row, the five of pentacles makes an appearance! However, today we are working with an upright version of this card. This suggests insecurity and worry.

One of my favorite sayings in the world is “Worrying is like a rocking chair. It passes the time, but doesn’t get you anywhere.”

That being said, those of us that are control freaks can’t help but passing the time in that fateful rocking chair.

Worrying is an art that is cultivated and nurtured over time. We weren’t born with this skill, but it almost makes us feel better to think about solutions or outcomes to things over and over and over again in our heads. It makes us feel like we could be prepared for any situation. Or at least, like we weren’t caught off guard. That’s why we keep doing it.

However, it is just taking up space in our brains. It doesn’t actually help us, it distracts us. It sabotages us. What is, is. And what will be, will be. Uncertainty is terrifying, and worrying helps us to wrap our heads around possible outcomes.

Think of your mind as Mrs. De Winter and your worry as Mrs. Danvers (I just watched Rebecca last night, if you don’t get the reference the film is on YouTube.)

Your mind is naive and so verklempt by the situation at hand that it is easily malleable. And your worry is doing mental gymnastics so decorated that Simone Biles would flip her shit. Your worry is convincing you into a deeper and deeper hole until you’re at the bottom of a well looking up at Buffalo Bill.

Your worry doesn’t serve you. It traps you. It might make you feel comfortable in the moment, because if you think about it constantly you have a handle on it. But in actuality, it serves as your coffin, being slowly nailed.

I worry about most things. But I’ve since thought up a way to escape from my worries. Now, when I find a thought persistently entering my mind, I write it down. I feel as though I haven’t lost it that way. Like it is safe. But at the same time, it doesn’t poison me anymore. It’s almost as if I have set my demon free.

This blog helps me as well. Whether it is a list, a diary, a blog, or even vocalizing to a friend, setting a thought free rather than hiding and fixating is a healthy alternative. You end the sabotage, and regain control over your brain.

So let it go, and stay witchy ( *)

 

 

 

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